Conservatives: You Have Only Yourselves to Blame

Some straight people like to search for the real reason gays want to marry:

  • We’re just out for benefits.
  • We’re trying to legislate acceptance.
  • We want to destroy marriage entirely.

Endless theories.  They rarely wonder about other straights, though.  Young or not, fertile or not, wanting kids or not, it doesn’t matter.  A straight couple in love wants to make a lifetime commitment, so of course they want to marry.

That’s right — of course.

So I have to ask them: what makes you wonder why we want the same thing?  We love our partners just as you do.  Of course we want to marry.  Is that not good enough?  Do you need more?

Okay then.  Come closer.  Listen carefully.

I’ll tell you the real, secret, and true reason we want to marry.  Here it comes:


From the day we were born, you taught us the most important thing in life is finding someone you can love and who will love you back.

You taught us that when we find this person, we should work hard to build the love, nurture the bond, treasure the commitment.

You taught us to promise our partner that we are here to have and to hold, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish from this day forward until death do us part.

You taught us to want marriage.

You taught us through our parents, our relatives, our friends.  You taught us through books and movies and TV.  You taught us in Sunday school, catechism class, and Hebrew school.

You taught us this.  You have only yourselves to blame.

So stop asking for the real reason.  It’s insulting.  We want it because we’re human beings.  We want it because we love the way you love.  We want it because you taught us to.

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